4 Ways to Respond When Someone Is Giving the Uncomfortable Truth About Yourself

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Everyone has experienced hearing a word of rebuke, criticism or correction from someone. To say the least, it's an unpleasant thing even when the intention is to be constructive. It's never a pleasant thing to hear the uncomfortable truth at first, but it is necessary and helpful.

Proverbs 27:5-6 says, "Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy."

We need to hear the bitter and inconvenient truth about our character flaws, skill weaknesses and hard circumstances. And while, yes, rebuke must be spoken in love and with the right heart, we can benefit from any uncomfortable truth spoken if we just take it in the right way.

Here are four ways that we can respond to make the most of uncomfortable truths others speak to us.

1. Don't Let It Eat Your Joy

When faced with criticism or rebuke, the first thing to get attacked is our joy. We can sometimes feel guilty of our shortcomings or even anger towards a denial of what is spoken to us. But there is really nothing to lose joy over. Everyone has some area that they can improve on, and we are no exception.

One way we can view rebuke the right way is to see it as a blessing. As Psalm 94:12 says, "Blessed is the man whom you discipline, O LORD, and whom you teach out of your law."

2. Give Them the Benefit of the Doubt

Another common response to rebuke would be to retaliate towards the person who speaks inconvenient truths about us. We view them as a burden and a threat, but that shouldn't be the case.

We should give people the benefit of the doubt when they speak negatively about us. Maybe they see something that we don't. Maybe they really do want us to grow. Maybe they're struggling in the same area and know what it looks like.

3. Check Your Heart

Jeremiah 17:9 tells us, "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?"

Because our hearts are in such a terrible position because of sin, our attitude should always to be on watch for wrong motives and bad character.

The wrong impulses that come to our heart come out unintentionally. It actually takes deliberate intention to stop our hearts from going the wrong direction and that's the route we should take.

4. Use It to Improve and Grow

All rebuke, correction and criticism is beneficial in some way, even those that are ill-intentioned. When we receive criticism, our response should be to ask, "How can I benefit from this opinion and how can I use it to grow?"

Psalm 141:5 says, "Let a righteous man strike me—it is a kindness; let him rebuke me—it is oil for my head; let my head not refuse it."