Many people are deeply concerned that online social media is harming us, both as individuals and as a society. For example: it stands accused of coarsening the discourse in our public square, feeding us misleading or outright false information, dividing us and depressing us.
I think these concerns are legitimate. For example, the internet has damaged the media industry I’ve worked in for over two decades in a number of different ways. I’ve described how the quality and the viability of journalism has been damaged and how the avalanche of information from podcasts and the plethora of media outlets we have today means an individual can only ever be badly informed.
The lowering in quality of writing and research, and unavoidable narrowing of our range of sources, means that there is justification for the frequent accusations that the mainstream media is biased or poor quality. Yet sadly this is probably an inevitable consequence of the internet age rather than anyone’s ‘fault’ in particular.
However social media’s harmful effects on individuals – worsening mental health, promoting tribalism and ignorance, for example - can be ameliorated by how we choose to engage with it. With some intentional adjustments, its effects on us can be transformed from harmful to enlightening, from a spiritual point of view. When social media brings out the worst in us, we can use that awareness to inspire change towards a better way rather than treading the same path.
My Twitter (X) love (hate) story
The title of this article might suggest I think myself a “good Christian” on X, but that is demonstrably not the case. X has proved beyond reasonable doubt that many people, including myself, are not full of the love of Christ. At times I can be rude, pontificate on issues I have no business in doing, and get into pointless arguments.
Social media seems to be particularly good at bringing out the worst in people. I have sometimes observed even people I know to be kind and gentle in real life start out on X with lots of positive posts, peacemaking and diplomacy – only to be transformed into a raging reactionary or radical within a few weeks.
Yes, X has brought out the worst in me at times. It has also exposed me to some of the worst racism I’ve ever witnessed, and the most unpleasant abuse directed at almost everyone, including myself. For a pretty mild example, after challenging some harsh rhetoric recently, an anonymous account gave this charming response: “Having read your output, with the upmost respect, you can f*** off Heather” - (without the asterisks).
But it is X’s ability to enrage and provoke that I believe has, surprisingly, produced spiritual fruit in me over time, when combined with prayer and the teachings of Jesus.
Early days
When I first started engaging with people on Twitter in 2010 I would get into heated debates with atheists.
For example, I recall a long discussion with an anonymous account named ‘Satan de Sade’. Looking back on this exchange, I can see it was unfruitful, mostly just trading insults.
As has often been observed, taking away the flesh-and-blood person in front of you somehow makes it so much easier to be rude. Now I rarely discuss anything unless I can perceive that a friendly and constructive discussion is possible.
But the chats that brought out the worst in me were a good step towards change. The more that Twitter entrapped me in this way, the more I became aware of my tendency to lash out and be defensive about my opinions. As a Christian, the words of Jesus present a worthy red warning light on such behaviour: “if you are even angry with someone, you are subject to judgement! If you call someone an idiot, you are in danger of being brought before the court. And if you curse someone, you are in danger of the fires of hell” (Matthew 5:22, NLT).
This kind of challenge should bring us to our knees. Only a short time in prayer is required to explore the roots of this kind of argumentative behaviour on social media: anger and pride, which manifests in the belief that your own opinions are worthy of the respect of others. Inner resentment is brought to light by having an online outlet for inner frustration. This catharsis is probably not a good thing in itself, unless it proves to be the impetus for change.
These bad attitudes and lurking sins might otherwise have been hidden, but can instead be dissected and brought to God in prayer. 2 Corinthians 13:5 says: “Examine yourselves to see if your faith is genuine. Test yourselves. Surely you know that Jesus Christ is among [in] you; if not, you have failed the test of genuine faith.”
As the eccentric charismatic pastor Dan Mohler often asks: “If you are squeezed, does Jesus come out?” X revealed to me that when I’m squeezed, Jesus does not come out. Therefore, prayer and repentance was required, and a regular renewing of my commitment to follow Christ as Lord, rather than my own ego.
I can still respond in a rude or condescending way at times on X. But over the years I have noticed that I am less inclined to give a knee-jerk reaction when someone is incredibly rude or expresses an opinion I consider to be ridiculous. On a good day, I can let it go completely, and feel no irritation or negativity at all, even love them. I don’t think that this progress would have been made if I had not been tested in the crucible of Twitter abuse and acrimony.
Ganging together
Another spiritual observation is how easy it is to become ‘tribal’ on social media, and how identifying with a group can sometimes remove all reason and kindness from a person.
It doesn’t matter what that group is – Christian, atheist, Democrat, Republican, Tory, Labour, transgender activist or gender critical, conservative or liberal. All can gang together in their hatred for the “other”.
It seems particularly acute when the tribe has a sense of their own moral superiority – which some people in all of these groups are liable to feel about themselves, because they are dealing with important ethical issues.
I have at times felt a tribal urge to associate with various different groups on different sides at various points in time as my views have changed. I was once liberal and left wing, now more conservative. I once was not religious, now I’m a Christian.
My own experience is that the inner mechanisms and temptations are the same. Our sinful natures want to feel superior to others, and to do so we criticise or even denigrate other people, dismiss their opinions and experiences, and elevate our own group and beliefs. Most people do not show this trait to an obvious extent. But through prayer and reflection, I believe that most mild criticism or labelling in a negative way has at least a grain of this tendency.
Like argumentativeness, I found that bringing this temptation into the light was the first step to change to be less tribal and instead feel and express love to all groups. When stepping outside of the “boxes”, it’s easier to see how the worst behaved people in each group are acting very similar to those in others, as pointing out the sins of others is so much easier to identify than in ourselves.
What seems to be happening in the online world is that while extremism flourishes on all “sides”, those in each group are mostly just concerned with others and ignoring what is going on in their own “tribe”, which is one reason why it could be getting worse.
But Jesus’s words in Matthew 7:3-5 are truly wise and potentially revolutionary: “Why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own? How can you think of saying to your friend, ‘Let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye.”
This helped me to see that we’re all in the same boat, and we all succumb to the same vices. I am just as susceptible as anyone else, inside or outside my particular social and political groups. The first step then is to work on myself, rather than being concerned about the wrongs of others.
But while Christians can be just as guilty of the dynamics of tribalism that feeds on pride, anger and hatred as anyone else – we do have a unique path of redemption and correction. When we find ourselves arguing or criticising, we can stop, look within, and repent of the roots of such behaviour: seeking the beautiful love of Christ in our hearts through prayer.
And so X has helped me to be more able to resist this kind of sin and seek the way of Jesus, though I certainly stray off the path more times than I would like. But each time I do so, I can learn more from Christ about love, if I bring the problem to him to deal with.
With the wisdom of Jesus, especially from his extraordinary Sermon on the Mount, our new online social arenas can become better places to be. Christ can redeem all places and communities, and X is no exception. Which, it has to be said, it desperately needs.
Heather Tomlinson is a freelance Christian writer. Find more of her work at https://heathertomlinson.substack.com or via X (twitter) @heathertomli
