St Paul wrote a timeless definition of love in 1 Corinthians 13, known as the “love chapter”, which is one of the most famous chapters in the Bible and is often read at weddings. This is the story …
Background
Paul wrote a number of letters to the Christian congregation in Corinth, and two survive in the New Testament.
Corinth was (and still is) a busy port in southern Greece. The church seems to have had issues with immorality and leadership rivalries.
The letter known as St Paul’s First Epistle to the Corinthians, or 1 Corinthians, was written somewhere between AD 50 and AD 60 to address issues in the fractious church in Corinth. There seem to have been debates over spiritual gifts like tongues and prophecy, but in that context Paul emphasises the value of love: “If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal” (1 Corinthians 13:1, NIV).
Love, he insists, is the greatest path to maturity, outlasting all gifts when Christ returns. Paul wanted to correct divisions in the Corinthian church, urging believers to prioritise agape, God's selfless love.
St Paul’s Definition
St Paul summed up love with the words in 1 Corinthians 13:4–8:
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres” (1 Corinthians 13:4–7, NIV).
Use in Weddings
A church wedding usually has to have at least one reading from the Bible, which the couple, in consultation with the minister, can choose. The passage from 1 Corinthians 13 is the most commonly chosen Bible passage at weddings because it offers a clear description of what love should look like in practice, which the couple or the minister see as an ideal for married life. As a result, many people associate 1 Corinthians 13 with romantic love and marriage.
It is not the set reading but has become increasingly popular, especially after it was quoted at the wedding of Prince Charles to Lady Diana Spencer in 1981. Films such as Love Actually or television weddings in series like Downton Abbey and Call the Midwife sometimes quote or allude to these words, reinforcing that association.
All the parts of the chapter do apply to marriage, but in context St Paul was writing about Christian love within the whole church rather than specifically about marriage. It belongs to a larger section about spiritual gifts and orderly worship that runs from 1 Corinthians 12–14, where Paul tackles pride, rivalry, and disorder around tongues, prophecy, and other gifts.
The Bible does not lay down any readings or ceremony for weddings at all, and in 1 Corinthians 7:6–9 St Paul even says it is better for some to remain unmarried, as he was. So quoting this section of the Bible is pure tradition and an established custom.
Positive Qualities of Love
Paul begins with positive qualities that define the character of love. He writes that love is patient and kind. Five hundred years ago, William Tyndale rendered it as “Love suffereth long and is courteous” (1 Corinthians 13:4). Love which is longsuffering, or patient, endures wrongs without retaliation. Love which is kind, or courteous, actively shows goodness and mercy.
What Love Is Not
Paul then contrasts the positive attributes of what love is with what it is not. He lists what love avoids, exposing self-centred distortions and perhaps pointing out aspects of the church to which he is writing that he dislikes. Paul wrote that love “does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil…”
Five hundred years ago, William Tyndale rendered it as “Love doth not frowardly, swelleth not, dealeth not dishonestly, seeketh not her own, is not provoked to anger, thinketh not evil, rejoiceth not in iniquity…” (1 Corinthians 13:4–6).
Paul is perhaps addressing issues in the church at Corinth when he stresses that love is not envious, rejecting rivalry and jealousy. He writes that love does not boast, is not proud, nor rude, nor bigoted, nor arrogant, nor ill-mannered, nor insensitive to others. It is not about fragile egos or one-upmanship. He writes that love is not self-seeking, is not easily angered, nor resentful, nor bitter, and does not keep score. This underscores that love is unselfish and focused on others.
What Love Does
Paul then states what love does. He states that love “rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” Five hundred years ago, William Tyndale rendered it as “rejoiceth in the truth, suffereth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth in all things”, which was taken nearly wholesale into the King James Version. These words depict commitment.
Spiritual Love
Paul writes similar things to the church in Galatia, where he outlines the fruit of the Holy Spirit. This list can be punctuated as “the fruit of the Spirit is …”, with the word “love” followed by a colon and a list of the attributes: “love: joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control” (Galatians 5:22–23). Jesus said that “By their fruits you shall know them” (Matthew 7:20). These are the characteristics of love which should be evident in Christians.
It is worth reminding ourselves that traits sometimes associated with religious people, such as arrogance, bigotry, pride, anger, narrow-mindedness, and harsh, discourteous language, are not seen as attributes of love and are not among the fruit of the Spirit.
Paul’s Summary
Paul ends with: “And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love” (v. 13). Love should be what underpins our attitudes, actions, and communications.
