Never lose the wonder
That was whispered to me, ever so quietly, this morning.
My husband had taken the kids to school and I was determined to curb my natural desire to get on and tackle chores and work emails before work. Determined to have a bit of 'you and me' time with God.
It wasn't long, after the overflow of song in my heart had subsided (I would call myself a musician – of sorts – so there is usually some song or other bubbling up), that God spoke that little phrase.
There wasn't anything else. Just a flow of peace, of affirmation. And those words, again and again.
"Never lose the wonder."
I was reminded of how He had been trying to get through to me in recent weeks. It was while I was editing a fantastic new book by Carrie Lloyd, in which I read about that quiet voice speaking to her in her 'secret place'. I have always enjoyed little moments throughout my day in which I've heard God communicate with me like that, but I suddenly realised that it had been a while since that had happened. I was really taken aback – how had I not noticed?
Do you ever get to that point?
You are so busy doing things for God, that somehow you miss Him completely?
Well, maybe not completely – you can point others to Him, feel His presence in corporate worship and bring words and scriptures for people, but actually your own close relationship with Him has somehow gotten disconnected.
I was struck again this morning how crazy it is that we Christians (the Martha-like ones anyway) tend to get caught up in the doing rather than the being. Just think about any other relationship – if you read books about a friend/lover/relative, spoke to others about them, spoke directly to them, but never took the time to listen to their response – never just sat and listened to what they wanted to talk about – the relationship wouldn't last too long would it?
So how come we can get to that point with God so easily?
I was at a conference recently and was really struck by something one of the speakers said: "Even when you are doing something silly God looks at you with delight. He just thinks 'ah... I need to teach her. It's okay. She'll be better soon.'"
Even when I've been too busy working for Him to even look at Him, He's still loved me and been delighted by me. Isn't that incredible? The same is true for you too! And even when we are doing things that are just downright silly in terms of affecting ourselves and others, He still looks on us as a fond Father, His love not diminished one little bit.
I have heard the question asked numerous times, "Is He enough for you?" Of course He is, but is that really the way our hearts respond – if we are truly honest?
Sometimes we simply need to pare back all our sophistications, all our busy-ness, all our 'know-it-all' attitudes and look again in wonder at our God. He's the father who accepts us completely; no matter what we do, who loves us perfectly and who constantly cheers us on.
While at that same conference it wasn't the amazing teaching or testimonies that moved me (both were fantastic) but some simple words from a song I've sung and played numerous times:
"Before the throne of God above
I have a strong, a perfect plea
A great high Priest whose Name is Love
Who ever lives and pleads for me
My name is graven on His hands
My name is written on His heart
I know that while in heaven He stands
No tongue can bid me thence depart
No tongue can bid me thence depart."
It was the phrase "Who ever lives and pleads for me" that undid me that day – and which I keep meditating on even now. The fact that my God is forever living and pleading FOR ME – yes, and FOR YOU too – blows my mind.
It's a truth I've heard countless times – and, like the portions of scripture I've read hundreds of times, the words had been just flowing over me without having an effect. Until that day.
I know that circumstances, disappointments, valley seasons etc all contribute to us feeling battle weary. And yet, even amongst that all, God whispers to us:
"Never lose the wonder."
It's in the simplicity that God calls us – to come away with Him and just to 'be'. To learn that our source is in Him. He is our everything. The God that flung the stars into space longs to turn the same arms that did that towards us and draw us close to Him.
Now isn't that wonderful?!